Archive for the ‘Beautiful Life’ Category

Now let the girl impress you

Posted: January 3, 2015 in Beautiful Life, Love

This article is for all guys aged between 18-28. The reason being that the most guys aged 29 and above are already married.

Now the meaning of love changes as our age changes. Every time the meaning of love seems correct, depending on  your corresponding age.
Lets come to one good advice to be given to  all young turks/singleton guys/ i-wanna-have-gf wannabes.

We all have watched many Hollywood movies, where the guy tells the girl in the mushiest, heart touching dialogs like ‘Hence forth the only aim of my life would be to bring a smile on your face’ , ‘ Every day, every moment of mine belongs to you’ , ‘I would do this blah blah ,blue blue, blee blee for you’ and etc
Now ask yourselves what should be the aim of the girl here? Is her job is to only keep accepting and enjoying the happiness being bestowed by guy? Why can’t the girl’s aim be to keep you happy for every single moment for the entire life?

@single guys-  you might have spend most of your life running behind a girl, doing various things for her, in many ways being used by her and trying to impress a girl. It is really not a sensible  thing to do. The girl who is very much out of your reach, who has her qualms of her ideal partner, who will always consider you ‘just a friend’, who is always confused about her ideal guy, etc  ..just doesn’t deserve your sweet efforts.

1) Love your own space. Love your self. Improve your own self. Enjoy your space. And the best news is that there are millions of ways to do that.
2) Make yourself so good, that eventually someone will come to your life who will love and respect you for the fantastic person that you actually are. NOW LET THE GIRL IMPRESS YOU.
3) One should always like and love some girl, BUT put in your time, energy and efforts on her only if she deserves so and more importantly if she reciprocates so

Enough of Gyan and looking for a practical Plan of Action? So here is it-
1) IF You love a girl, you should definitely express your feelings to her. She would have definitely spurn your overtures (Else you wouldn’t be reading this article :P). If you really love her, be around her as friend but keep telling her that he love her. BUT  DON’T DARE go on to all stupid things to impress. She has to to like you for your true nature and not for what you are forcefully doing, only to impress her.
If the girl is really sensible, she will quietly observe you and evaluate you for a long period of time. If things have to happen, it will happen.
2) IF You like a girl, but she is a filmy girl  and dreamy Walt Disney story believer  and has huge pile of expectations…then then then….RUN AWAY
3) IF You like a girl who is just 22 years and you are 29 years..then then then…RUN AWAY.
4) IF You like a girl,with whom you are most comfortable,who is genuinely impressed with your original traits & nature, with whom silence is comfortable …then then then …MARRY HER
5) IF you like a girl, is from higher class of society than you, much more good looking than you are, is like totally hi-fi  …then then then…no need to run away,but you shouldn’t ideally marry her. The reason being that she happens to a high maintenance girl. Can she live in the current society where you are staying? Can she adjust from her high standards to your middle class standards? Can you even live up to her high expectations? Most often the answer would be a NO.
You would be under tremendous pressure for your entire life in only matching up to her expectations and standards. In short, you would be in a forced mode to always impress her.

Need testimonials as to what happens when you invest time on improving yourself and not unnecessarily  waste your time on impressing girls?
Ask all the 28 year plus men whom you know or their friends, who were royally rejected by many girls in their younger days. But they worked hard in life, got great jobs and are now financially and mentally stable. Now they have even more beautiful and sensible wives than the girls who rejected them earlier.

So stop to impress the girl – improve yourself- where eventually someone impresses you 🙂

Deepesh Chandran


How much ever Bollywood/Hollywood  romantic movies inspire us, how much ever attempts we make to ‘patofy’ a girl, how many times we dream of having a love marriage…the fact remains that 80% of marriages in India still happen to be ‘ARRANGED MARRIAGE’

So having accepted this fact, how and what does one do while choosing the right boy/girl through arranged marriage?
Here is what we can do while choosing the right guy/girl in arranged!

Choosing the guy/girl for arranged marriage:

@Boys – When you meet the girl for the first time, please don’t  start with asking the sterotype Q’s like “what do you expect from your life partner”, “do you know cooking”, “what you expect from the marriage” etc etc. First make her feel comfortable with you, so start with topics which would interest her. Discuss about the latest good movie running these days. If she likes dancing,discuss about Madhuri Dixit and her grace. Girls love to discuss on such topics. Her stiff body language would ease up and she would start behaving her own self. You would be marrying this girl,so she needs be her own self when she is talking with you. As the conversation hits from there, you would surprisingly get the answers of your sterotype questions in the midst of your talk . If you don’t get it, when conversation extends, you can sneak in your sterotype Q’s
Being funny is not everyone’s cup of tea but cracking a joke here and there, lightens the situation a lot. Santa-Banta jokes are not necessary, even real life funny incidents can also do the needful.

MOST IMPORTANTLY..please be your own self! In arranged marriage, you both might not get many chances to meet, that she can know the ‘real you’ after every new meeting. If she has to like you, it has to be the real you. If you are shy,so be it! Some girls find shy really cute.


  1. Try avoiding bragging about yourself. You might be a Hritik Roshan, but no need to showcase it. It is a big turn-off for many girls. If she has to get impressed by you, she definitely will get, without your bragging.
  2. Hiding things. Honesty is highly needed in an arranged marriage. Some things can’t be told in the first meeting, but they have to told in the next meeting
  3. Wear clothes which you usually wear. No need to wear a formal clothes to prove that you are a good boy.
  4. Don’t judge the girl highly on looks. After 15 years, neither you nor she are going to look great. Always look for qualities by which she can be a great companion for the next 50 years of your married life. Of course she needs to carry herself well, is what you need to check


@Girls – Ideally when you meet for the first time the guy is supposed to break the ice, but not all boys may be outspoken. So there is no harm in you yourself doing the honors of breaking the ice.
Always remember that you both have positively come to meet each other, so both would be tensed, excited and  positively looking forward.
Indian boys are typically interested in cricket, video games , movies, food and Sunny Leone 😉 . Of course you need not discuss the last topic 😛 . Girls are mostly lesser interested in cricket and movies, so movies and food happens to be common topic very often! You never know how amazingly you can hit off, once you find a strong common point of interest.

Now I must admit that it tougher for a girl to actually analyze if the boy is faking or is he genuine or not. Your parents will only see if the boy is earning well and if he comes from a decent family. They always tend ignore other things. So the onus is only on you to find if the guy’s nature is good or not, is he genuine, is his nature compatible with my nature, etc. How on earth do you find it out?
Take your time here and don’t get flown away. Try thinking more from head than from heart. Consult sensible and mature people in your life about this prospect and his nature. Don’t take advice from dumm girls.


  1. Please don’t probe much into his job and profession. For sure, your parents will do that job for you. Although salary is a critical factor, don’t make him feel like he is sitting in a job interview.
  2. In an Indian arranged marriage, the highest criteria for a ideal groom is his salary. My suggestion- don’t give it so much high preference. He might be highly qualified, just that he hasn’t got his right break till now. So judge him overall for his professional growth
  3. Hell with the looks, only check if he carries himself well with the whatever looks God has given him.
  4. If you had already prepared a list of 10 points that you seek in your potential husband, and if the guy in front fulfills even 6/10 or 7/10  of the points….marry that guy. You can never get 9/10 or 10/10.

When the engagement happens-
“Time” is biggest problem in arranged marriage. You get to spend little time with this guy/girl and  as soon as things seem positive by then, parents get you both engaged. Well, we can’t do anything with it and have to live with this issue. But please try and keep a little long gap between engagement and marriage i.e. courtship period.
It is the most beautiful period of your life, when things are clicking with you both. You would love it. That is one good reason, why you need a little long courtship period.
If things aren’t clicking well within you both, then take your time. Please analyze each other’s priorities.
Most importantly, if things go really very bad between you and everything is going out of hand, then its OK, you can OPT OUT from the marriage. Its better to have broken engagement, than marrying the wrong person

So summarizing the entire blog, please go ahead and successfully get into this sacred and great institution called Arranged Marriage. Feel free to ask me any doubts by commenting on my blog. Just in case, I don’t happen to reply to your queries on this blog, you can approach me on this contact details below.

I do professional paid consultation for arranged marriages, so for any doubts in arranged marriage – please contact me at or 91-9970838025 and have my setup in Pune

Deepesh Chandran


Fun is not equal to BOOZE

Posted: September 14, 2013 in Beautiful Life

Most of our friends drink and some drink really hard. Any non-drinker is often asked this golden question “How do you enjoy in life, if you don’t drink?”. Alcohol drinkers feel that the only ultimate fun element on earth is Booze!

This article is NOT about explaining the ill effects of hard drinks on your health. For that you have the stupid  ads, nagging girlfriends, boring parents, irritating well-wishers, non-knowledgeable doctors to bore you on it. This article is to all alcoholics  who drink really hard, to prove WHAT A BIG LOSER YOU ARE!


Technically booze titillates those neurons which make you feel happy, tension free and devoid of all pressures…for few hours. In addition to increasing the GABA and decreasing the glutamate in the brain, alcohol increases the amount of the chemical dopamine in the brain’s reward center, which creates the feeling of pleasure that occurs when someone takes a drink.  So what are reasons that people all actually drink?
1) It makes you feel really good.
2) It makes you drop all social inhibitions i.e. you are suddenly a fun person after drinking
3) You suddenly feel the drive to hit the dance floor, when you are in a disc
4) It relieves you of all office pressures, family issues, personal problems
5) and so on…

Having understood what booze does to you, I have biggest questions to all hard drinkers – WHY ON EARTH DO YOU REQUIRE A EXTERNAL HELP OF BOOZE….TO REMOVE THE SHY SIDE OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM?
Why can’t you feel good about life, without drinking?
Why can’t why you drop your social inhibitions, without drinking?
Why can’t you handle other pressures by yourself, without drinking?

So can you finally admit that you are a coward who needs harmful product named alcohol to make you brave!
You are suffering from low self esteem that you need alcohol to temporarily regulate your mood. That too, you need this  many a times.

Why can’t you be high on LIFE?
Life definitely gives you its bunch of setbacks, pressures, traumas, tensions…but it also gives you option to ‘choose‘!
Choose to either crib over your problems and temporarily forget by drinking OR accept this problem,overcome/by-pass it and eventually be happy with other good things in life
Choose to either be an introvert, never improve and temporarily get help from drinking OR work at it to become an extrovert, through facilitated workshops or self help sessions

Now lets decipher my favorite statement- Booze would be equal to fun BUT fun is not equal to booze-
Our dear alcoholic friends meet up at some friends place, hit a bar,catch up at some party …and drink drink & drink and eventually claim they had the best fun time of their life. They sadly just have ONE single option to have fun. What losers!!

So what are the other options to have fun?
1) Positive attitude– This is the biggest pre-requisite to have fun. Until you see the brighter side of everything, you can never be happy or have fun
2) Develop a passion/hobby– This could be a sport, music , movies, anything into art/creative, etc . This will give you the kick which you get from booze. Mind well, its kick is much more satisfying than booze. (e.g. Dance lovers will accept Prabhudeva’s dialog where he says ‘When the dope of dance is there in your life, then you don’t need any other dope’)
dance is fun
3) Find individual high points– Few help themselves with shopping when they are upset. It suddenly makes you feel very good. Some seek solace in good food. Some even get high after sleeping well. So dig out your own high points.
food makes me happy
4) Make someone happy– It could be doing some social work, helping your friends, lending a helping hand to your family members for any work
social service
5) Move out– Hang out with friends, go out on trips/picnics/ long drives, hit some gaming zone
6) Be with loved ones- Hang out with best buddies, be with your GF/wife, spend time with family

Thus all alcohol addicts must understand that if you really want, alcohol can really substituted with various things in life. Many of your loved ones would like you to do that. Thanks for reaching this far with the article

Deepesh Chandran

How I saw year 2012

Posted: December 31, 2012 in Beautiful Life

= Salman Khan shows that only nonsense movies can cross Rs.100-200 crore mark and there is no place left for sensible cinema  in this world
= Luckily good movies like Barfi, Kahaani, English Vinglish, GOW etc  get commercial success, and prove that sensible movie audience are still alive in this country
= Himesh Reshmiya kills India with his irritating song ‘Chalao na nano se baan re’. I believe some drub was infused in that song! Any person who would unfortunately hear that song in the morning, this song would get stuck  in his head for the entire day 😦 Needless to say…he would end up having a horrible day
= An Akshay Kumar seem to be released every month. Most of them were hopeless, but we excuse his nonsense movies…. for giving us a fantastic movie like OMG- Oh My God
= RoShit Sharma continues with his extra-ordinary bad form, fails continuously in ODI’s, …..and instead BCCI make Sachin Tendulkar retire from ODI’s 😛
= 3 cricket legends retire – ‘Sankat Mochan Laxman’ , ‘Great Wall of India’ and “God’ 😦
= London Olympics rocked! Sushil Kumar turns into legend of sorts by winning two back to back Olympic medals. He still remains the most underrated sportsperson in Indian. Women in India find two role models in Siana Nehwal and Mary Kom
= Arvind Kejriwal did the best thing on earth by entering politics. Also Modi creates history and is now the prime runner for PM candidate for BJP. With both these factors, I saw see this rare glimpse of hope of better India in future.
= Mobile app- Watsup was definitely the buzz word of 2012
= Every second friend on my FB had his profile pic of 1) he/she getting married 2) he/she with a new born baby in hand . Nice to see lot of good news 🙂
= DigVijay Singh was biggest entertainer of the year. I madly laughed on each of his comments. Hoping for more , from this stand up comedian
= Really good to see women protesting strongly against the Govt. for a social cause and their own protection. Hope more and more people realize the need to uproot the current Govt. by getting politically educated and voting

Thanks to the media mileage and protesters,  there has been huge outrage for the rapists of the delhi girl. I see all people, specially women asking for the death for the 4 rapist,others asking for even torturous death, few asking for castration etc. People on facebook are changing their profile pic to a black dot, few sending some online signing petition, few updating some really angry/abusive facebook update etc etc.(BTW take it from me that death penalty will be never given to a person who commits a rape in India). I will later mention in this article, why it will never happen in India) But somehow all are missing the point and their emotions are totally misfiring. People, specially ladies are just venting their anger, but missing out from the main point.


In Delhi, daily 2 girls get raped. Thus with that calculation, in the past 4  days when we all were protesting, 8 girls from Delhi have already been raped!! In India, a girl gets raped every 23 minutes. Thus by the time, you might have read this blog article, a girl was already raped within that time!!

The biggest contributor to rapes in India is our weak Indian Laws and system-
Our current system is too weak and it hardly does anything to protect any woman. Even more pathetic are the laws.
HINDRANCE IN CURRENT LAWS-  1) If the character of the rape victim is proved bad, then the rape accused can get away with the rape charge!! Now how easy is it, to prove the bad character of a girl. Get few fake guys to say that girl slept with them earlier, fake remarks, fake proofs etc…and the character of that girl is proven dirty!
2) 81% of the rape accused in India get away with the charges because of many such loop holes in our laws
3) Rape sentence varies from 7 years to life imprisonment. Here again the rape accused lives in jail with our own money i.e. tax payers money
4) Mental rape with police- When a rape victim approaches the police after she is raped, she is grilled with highly insulting questions. Little do people know that by law the police has to compulsorily provide a lawyer to a rape victim, when she gives her statement to police.

The other biggest contributor to rapes in India are the ‘Human Rights Commission’-
It is because of this idiots, death penalty to a rape accused will never happen. They will oppose saying that taking the life of a person is not ethical! They will never ever approve those torturous death, castration etc which almost all are demanding. So all my friends asking for the same, please wake up. Your demands will never be fulfilled .I wonder if someone rapes the daughters of these human right commission members, then  will they not demand death penalty to the rapists!
When a girl is raped, she is killed 1000 times. By giving rape accused death penalty, we are still killing him just once.

Thus regarding ways to stop a rape, there are few macro level solutions and micro level solutions.
So lets look at the macro level-
I) The best way is to build a strong law. There needs a radical change in the law and fast track courts for rape cases.

II) Morally Educating the men.
Now even an uneducated fruit vendor also rapes and even highly qualified elite class guy also rapes. Thus it has nothing to do with rich/poor. As a guy, I tell you that a lot depends on the type of people , a guy dwells with. Secondly he is never given moral education by his family that respecting a woman is his  highest duty.

So  now lets look at some micro level solutions
I) Self defense for girls
Get yourself really strong with any martial arts/ self defense techniques. Let that bas**** even touch you, and you kick his a** so badly,then he never gets up again. This of course is little too much for a girl to do. But that’s one strong option. The Government or police won’t protect you, so you better do it yourself.
II) Using of onion spray/ tooths etc
If no karate, then an eye spray or wearing those tooths are easier ways to protect oneself.

The best way is to have the right laws and system. BUT BUT BUT…that will never happen in India. We will never have the strict rape punishment as in Arab countries.
So what do I do, to get those rights laws and system?
1) Madly go out and protest in huge crowds in front of your  corporator, MLA, MP house and demand him to go this upper boss and fulfill your demand. You got to do the same thing, that people are protesting in Delhi. OHHHHH….but then I release …we all are too busy with work and who has time to do all this time pass!!! We better sit idle at home and crib about the Govt . So this option is out of question.
2)Please vote for the right corporator, MLA …who would actually listen to you. Get the right party into the Goverment, who would actually do things for you. The current Government cares a damn about you. Hence I would request all the women to please vote. I have hardly seen any young ladies coming to vote. Few of own female friends felt that it was ‘low society’ to stand in that row among ‘low society’ people in a sidey voting room. Thus they didn’t vote. So @females…. please please please VOTE!!

So let me summarize my entire article. Death penalty to all rapists will never happen in India. To do that, the Government must change, as current Government is least bothered about you. So you better start protecting yourself or change the Government by voting them out.

Rotulus are those permanent cry-babies, who continuously crib and cry about everything in life..and that too 24×7.

I)Firstly recollect how many of you have “Rotulu” friends? Try and recollect the “Cry babies” in your entire list of friends or alliances.
Now recollect the various events/outings/movies/attended marriages/parties/conversations etc etc you spend with these rotulus?

You might find a similar pattern with them in all these events, where they were there with you. They crib about everything and spoil the mood of the entire event. They seem unhappy/upset/mood-off with anything that would happen in the course of that event. They will always-always-always see the dark side of life…in short these rotlus are perennial and  life-long rotlus, whom even God can’t change.

Let me explain with an example –
1.Even if you go for an average movie, they will keep complaining continuously during the entire 2/2.30 hours of movie that…”kya bore movie hai?”, “I simply paid unnecessarily for this movie” , “Instead of this movie, I would have slept for 3 hours at home” etc etc. Its because of them, even average movie seems hopeless, deep intelligent movie seems bullshit, mind blowing good movie seems average!!!
2. If you for an outing with friends in a car/bus/train/bike. They will always complain about the dust around, too much sunshine and heat, boring journey etc. Worst part is that they keep doing it repeatedly.Thus average journey seems life threatening to you.
3.Now here comes the most dangerous situation. This is when you have a Rotulu in your office itself. Every single day said he will crib about how sad his life is, how less the organization paying you and him, bad things in your organization etc etc. Ohhhh God!!!

Life is too short and too competitive. We have to be content with what we have and find happiness with small things in life. One has to be very positive in life and fighter in life. A perennial Rotulu in your life takes this all away from you.
With him around , you will never realize happiness in small things in life. You will tend to be negative in life, as his cribbing and negative words subconsciously make you a negative person with negative thoughts.

II)Now on the other hand, lets recollect the positive guys in life and recollect all the events you spend with this positive guy

Let me explain with an example-
1. If you go for an average movie with this positive guy, he will make fun of the movie or keep passing comments amongst yourselves (not shout in the theater) that cheer up the entire mood. Thus even a bad movie, doesn’t seem that bad to you, because you actually enjoyed the company in those 2.30 hours
2. If you go for an outing with friends in a car/bus/train/bike. This guy will try and take pics of the places and state that he saw something new. He will never repeatedly keep saying how hopeless the entire journey is. He will strike some interesting conversation with you and somehow you actually end spending some amount of quality time. He will make you hear some new song from his i-pod and sometimes you start liking that song too.
3.If this guy is in your office- This guy will always motivate you in your office. Alright your organization isn’t treating you well, but he will always make you positive and suggest the right steps to do.

A positive friend will make realize that life isn’t that bad/tough as you imagine you to be.He will always make you realize the brighter side of life and give you the right advice you. Here is the biggest catch…YOU NEED TO BE REALLY LUCKY TO HAVE SUCH POSITIVE FRIEND IN YOUR LIFE.
Now you have understood the difference between a positive friend and a rotlu friend. Yes..I agree that each friend is important in your life-be it the positive one or perennial rotulu one. But these permanent rotulus will never change in their life, even if you try to change and help them. You will end up being negative, if you spend more time with them.

Thus, understand the perils of having such cry-babies in your life and keep them at bay.

As the title goes…Avoid the ‘Rotulus‘ in your life

(I would like to end with my personal anecdote. In the mid of 2012, I had been to an AR Rehman concert in Mumbai. I was with a bunch of highly energetic and positive friends. I have been to umpteen musical concerts in my life earlier, this show was simply the best of all. With due credit to Rehman, the reason why I even more loved and enjoyed this concert , was because of the ‘non-rotulu‘ company I had with me. Had I been with a bunch of rotulus , then I wouldn’t have enjoyed it this much)

Deepesh Chandran

Humble Disclaimer– Request you to not take this article personally. This is subjective thought. I am strong believer of God myself.No offense to anyone , intended here

To start things off,let me tell you that there is just 1 God in this world and we just call him by different names. As simple as that.

Please believe in God, believe in his power, trust in the prayers that you offer him,be sincere with your efforts and believe that he will only give the best to you.
Now if you feel that God is not good, and you don’t trust him..then at least seek the blessing of the people, to whom you trust i.e. mainly your parents. Treat them as God and continue to take their blessing.
Now for any reason, you are unable to do that as well….then at least believe in your own self. You need to trust yourself and back yourself in everything that you do.

What does Bible, Bhagwad Geeta or Khuraan teach us?
Well….they all eventually teach the same thing. This eventually tell us to be good humans, do good deeds, be positive and keep your deeds clean.

Let me try to answer few FAQ’s which i always had!
1) Would God be happy, when I fast for him?
Honestly, I really don’t understand the logic behind it. How would God be happy, if you stay hungry? Wouldn’t he be more happy when instead of fasting, you would offer food to some poor or food-deprived people!!!
I understand that your fast will only bear fruit, when you do it with full shraddha . I know of this guy who fasts quite often for God, but then he manipulates/cheats a lot in his work and personal  life. How would God be pleased with such a guy?

2)Would God be happy, when I visit temple daily?
YES…of course.
NO….if you daily visit temple, but hardly follow his preaching. Sadly, majority of the people who visit the temples, fall under this category. 

3)Would God be angry, when I don’t visit the temple?
NO…he will not be angry.
This is if and only if …you strongly follow his preaching, continue with your good deeds and believe his existence . God is already within each one of us. If you love and respect all beings around you, then you are respecting God himself. Thus you need not visit the temple  to connect with God as such. You can connect with him any place and any time.

4)I am such a good human being, then why does God trouble me so much?
Here we have to define ‘good human being’ and ‘trouble’ here! What all have you actually done that you are a ‘good human being’ and what on earth do you mean that God is ‘troubling’ you.
You take any trivial issue and say that your life is very sad. Something bad happens in your life, then you feel that you are living the dreaded life on his earth. Ohh please watch  some episodes on Aamir’s ‘ Satyamaye Jayete’ or google or find videos of the pathetic life that 60% poor Indians are living.
If you look at your own life from 3rd person’s perspective, you are living a much better life.
OK..some bad things might have happened to your life, but this what God has destined for you. What good or bad things, you have in your life, is rightly being weighed by God and given to you 🙂 So trust him for all the bad things that are happening in your life.

5)Should I pray to God?
Of course..YES
Praying instills the feeling of belief. The belief is that there is someone to take care of us and if I am sincere with my efforts, then someone will always protect and help of me.

6)How come people who are atheist , still so successful in their life, without the help of God?
God is eventually belief. Recollect the 3rd sentence, I had mentioned in the start of this article. An atheist would be successful in his life, only if he strongly believes in himself and backs himself with his good deeds.
I am sure God would be happy with you, even if you are an atheist……provided only if you keep your deeds clean and  be a good human being.

Deepesh Chandran